the internet

let me begin.

I am drunk beyond any comparision you can make.
I am drunk.
I suppose youre right. I am a drunk. I care to much. I will never function as a normal person that can live in your world.

I forgot how much it mattered that I have no one to call, except chad at 12 am. Good friend. And Im two shots down into a holeeee, a deep dark hole with no one to accompany me.

I wont frogive you. I forgot, that i am also god, that i will forgive you only as you deserve, and you do not. You are wallowing. And you are lost, and I wil always be lost to help you, if you ever need.

I am not supposed to be someone you meet as a person. Only think of me as a thought. That only comes to be in silent, dark night, surrounded by deeer that arent near ... somewehere in the dark .... tthat wood .... theshrub.

I am NOT going to LOVE YOU FOREVER
. I hate YOU and I don't forgive you. And i CANT WAIT until you're a distant memory in PLACE, that calls itselg FRANCE, butyt its only a DRUNKEN SPELL tha can takeyou seomwhere that makes you feel better for a minute. AND THEN IT TAKES IT BACK becaouse you are nothing but a hole. A DFEEP DARK HOLE full of nothing. and. narrow grief.

you ar enothing to me. and you startedit that way. sincethe very first. day. you met. me.